sleeky shit from the internetz …

Jennifer Lopez Delivery Around Tabloid Schedule: my pukey feeling about so-called JLo is no secret… from my hatred to that stupid fucking ghetto-bullshit of a nickname and all that scummy Jenny from the block bullshit. Bitch got about as much money as God and she want to talk bullshit about being from the block and some bullshit about the rocks that you got bullshit. HATE! I just hate her so much and all of that previous P Diddy horeshit. Motherfuckers in their thirties need to start God Damn acting like they’re in their thirties. All of this nickname, ghetto fuckshit burns my ass. I love how these rich motherfuckers want to talk nonstop about the fucking ghetto. Go there twats and live and buy your spaghettios and Olde English at the bodega and get out of the paparazzi lens all the fuck already. HATE!

Top 10 Films About Nonconformists: although I always feel somewhat manipulated by list posts that are Top 10 this or that… this one is okay. Mainly because I’m a fan of the movie Barfly. And, I was reading Charles Bukowski and digging his fucked-up nonsense long before it was cool to be digging his fucked-up nonsense. I’m also a fan of Fight Club. My friend and I used to imitate it when we were out drinking. That’s to say, we’d just sort of randomly blind-side the other and start beating the hell out of each other. Often times in the middle of a bar. And, it felt good in a perverse way. And, I like that line, “How’s that working out for you?” So, there you go Alternative Reel.. there’s a mention… now, are you happy? What I’d like to see is a Top 10 list of the sexiest Rated R Movies of All Time. I mean the ones that actually get you horny.

Jessica Sierra Sex Tape: say it isn’t so. I remember this American Idol heffer who often had on some type of baggy sports jersey on… she made me think of gas. Well, she’s got a sex tape, and, of course, I do want to see it.

Jay Leno vs. David Letterman: who the fuck cares? Neither one of them is funny. And, they cart the money to the bank in fucking wheelbarrows. You see why I got such a problem with this world. THEY ARE NOT FUNNY! Why the fuck are they making all the money????? See, I’m not even making this one a live link in protest of our culture.

Stan Hammer