Celebrity Oops Nip Slip Part 2
Celebrity Oops Nip Slip Part 2
Okay, we’ve established that women have breasts and nipples of various sizes. Now, you see, we often think of breasts in respect to their erotic properties, but, of course, on a biological level, the human female breast has mammary glands which serve to produce milk for the woman’s newborn. Now, the fact that many new mothers today are running off to the nearest 7-11 for formula, etc… well, that (no offense ladies) only indicates our general revolt against nature and natural processes.
And, that’s what these articles are all about: our fucked-up perceptions concerning the most natural thing in the world: our anatomy–you know…our tits and nipples. (oh, shudder… I just remembered a Lever 2000 commercial about all of “our parts” … yikes!)
Okay, so, let’s take a step back and consider the basics of this issue. Women have bodies covered with skin, and, naturally, the breasts are covered by skin as well. Somewhere around the center, generally, of the breast is a little, usually, protruding button called a nipple, which, in turn, is surrounded by a pink to brown circle called the areola.
The breasts have mammary glands which produce the moo juice… I mean milk! The mammary glands have some lobules; and, the breast has lactiferous ducts which get the milk to the nipple, so it can ultimately get to the baby’s mouth. WAH! WAH! yummy!
The breasts are composed of what’s called adipose tissue, which, is a fancy medical term for fat. So, basically, the female breasts are wonderful fat deposits filled with ducts to allow milk to get to the nipple so it can get to the baby’s mouth.
Okay, that’s the basic, biological function of breasts. Now, I’ll tell you, there’s another evolutionary theory about breasts serving to attract males, but… I tell you: bet your bonnet that a man came up with that one! Any skinny girl with zippo titto will tell you that a wet pussy and a case of Bud will get the cocks lining up just fine.
The purpose of breasts is to produce nourishment for the offspring, and, a large part of our American fascination with the breasts and nips results from their verboten (forbidden) status. To support this view, consider the different attitudes and calm views you find in many European countries where nudity is approached with such a different perspective; and, where everyday nudity, nips, tits, and buttocks are so much more prevalent in mainstream advertising, commercials, billboards, commonplace topless beaches, etc. You just wouldn’t have a Janet Jackson Nipplegate in France, Denmark, or Amsterdam.
There’s a lot of things totally right about our American culture: make no mistake of that; but, we’ve got something seriously fucked-up in our heads when it comes to the female nipple. And, we’ve got an equally nutso fascination with celebrity. You put the two together and it’s like the chocolate going into the peanut butter… that’s to say… it’s MAYHEM! Just consider that ideas and sensational little headlines are seen on the web with titles like Celebrity Nip Slips! And, don’t forget the cute Celebrity Oops Ooops! The very existence of that alone indicates our obsessions. Oh, it is a hooter all right… I mean hoot!
So, to continue, let’s take a look at what we consider to be in our current climate Ten Significant Celebrity Nip Slips… read on…
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