And, I’ll tell you something else Katie… you complained that I be calling you white girl, but you never made a good argument white girl. You should have quoted Foucault:

…we must rid ourselves of a whole mass of notions, each of which, in its own way, diversifies the theme of continuity

Oh Katie white girl I know that F Man quotation gonna fuck yo white ass to the moon! LOL! Yea, college boy LeeRoy I be hanging with be teaching me all sorts of knowledge! You bitch! So, here’s the Russel Brand Katy Perry post you want! LOL in yo whitey face!

Katie I do not know why you so fascinated by this bullshit! Basically, Russell Brand look like a funky monkey of a werewolf, and I don’t know what white girls be seeing in that white boy! I guess I right cause I see Katy Perry ditching Russell sober ass. Former drunkie werewolf ass used to like his Jack Daniel and druggies all over da place. Katy Perry still be a party girl.. she want to put on silver boots, blue hair and shake her white girl ass all over da dance club. So, there you go … and fuck you other Katie leave my black ass alone. ANd, as for you Skippy… yea, I know Katy Perry get yo white weenie horny… here’s a picture of da celeb twat for ya loser boy.

Okay Katie! Get this LaTosha. Katie starts calling me this morning. She’s drunk. Surprise. Yawn. And, she’s going bonkers about wanting us to have a site map. I said, “Katie, who gives a fuck. Nobody reads this blog anyway. It’s a piece of shit. I don’t even know why you’re trying to revive the dead bastard you stupid bitch.”

Get this. Katie says, “This site features some of my best academic writing. And, I’m not a stupid bitch. I’ll have you know it’s Dr. Witherspoon to you!” LOL! Ah, geez, when this girl gets drunk she gets soooooooooooo hilarious. Anyway, Dr. Witherspoon, here you go:

Celebrity Satan Guide To The Whore’s Bones

NOW LEAVE ME ALONE! I WANT TO DRINK A 12 PACK OF COORS!!!!!! You are not the only one who likes to get her drink on! LOL LaTosha I used your black girl “Get drink on” phrase…. IT’S SO STUPID!!!!!!!!

It early, and that just weird, and I can’t seem to get my mind around it. Then they like singin’ Jingle Bell to some little doggy. I don’t know ya’ll. I like Ellen a lot. Katie do too. Katie do because Ellen lesbian and promote lesbian thing. As for me…I don’t give a fuck whether somebody lesbian or straight or nun. The biggest problem with America is that it not “live + let live” enough. People just can’t leave other people the fuck alone.

You want to know why I like Ellen?
She funny. That why.

I see people getting stirred up because Marissa Miller do DT Magazine. First thing I think is who the fuck Marrisa Miller, what DT, and why anybody give a fuck. Then I see…oh, she a skinny white girl blond hair tit hanging out, and I say, “Oh, yes, of course…my black ass woke up for another day in AMerica.”

ftw

Ah shit, I all a-twitter and pissed-off this morning. I been doing some self-analysis past few days cuz somebody other day said I was a mad person. And, then I some shit on Dr. Phil about same topic. Don’t get me wrong: Dr. Phil a dopey fat man but sometime he make a point playas. But, am I mad? Like, when I see this shit it do make me kinda mad … it be an article where writer wetting her panty with delight cuz she got a picture of Jennifer Garner kissin’ her baby.

Okay, first thing first …why Jennifer Garner even famous? First off…bitch old. NUmber 2: bitch ugly. Yea, she white so a lot of Jennifer Garner ugliness forgiven. And, listen…when I say “bitch” it ain’t in a mean way. Okay? It like when I call my best friend (of my white friend) Katie bitch…it playin’…so, pull them bunched-up panty out because this is the way people talk…yea, the people that don’t be shoving their face with WOnder Bread + Perrier Water…okay?

But, seriously, Jennifer Garner ain’t even a Plain Jane. She a Ugly Jane. Oh, hell that ain’t nice. I know. But when you put your ass out there and you goin’ to be posin’ in stocking and shit and putting yourself volunteer on fashion magazine cover you make yourself fair game! So don’t be gettin’ all sanctimonious + shit with me! So, why she famous? She in some stupid ass Alias bullshit. She in most stupid ass Dude Where My Car with over-rated (and weird!) white boy Ashton Kootchie. Damn, don’t get me started on him. It make me mad as hell!

So, why she famous? Okay, that first point. Now, you click that link above you taken to most amazingly nauseating article (and comments) about how fucking sweet it is that Garner a mother. From the article, you’d think white girl either Virgin mary or only woman ever shit out a baby! Author has this to say,

These pictures of Jennifer Garner picking up her daughter Violet from school yesterday and kissing her on the cheek are HURTING me! Could these two be any cuter? I can’t wait too see their new little baby and find out what they name him. You know it’s just a matter of days before we report Jennifer going into labor… Maybe he’ll end up being a Christmas baby.

I read that and it make me mad! Them picture hurting you? Oh, baby, don’t get me started on topic of hurting! She can’t wait to see they new little baby. Well, they can wait to see anything about you! THEY DON’T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT YOU! JENNIFER GARNER DOESN’T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT YOU! WHY DO YOU CARE ABOUT THEM? Lot of stupid people in this world, and this be a good example. Why somebody goin’ to get obsess with celebrity life? That just stupid as fuck!

You wanna see something even stupider? Check out this comment:

They look so bonded, and Violet seems to be a very healthy little girl. cute

Now, that comment hurting me! I hope they look bonded you stupid ass motherfucker! They mother and motherfucking daughter for fucking out loud! That her child! I hope to God they’re bonded!

And somebody else say,

Yes, you can start to see the Ben in her.

Get a motherfuckin’ life! Oh, the poor girl. If she gonna resemble that white boy’s narrow head and distort facial features….oh, the poor thing!

There was one commenter who make a little sense:

both mother and daughter are unattractive. How many staged shots can they have? and she does look like Pepe Longstocking.

In closing, fuck ya’ll.

I just got a call from geeky Skippy. He say that Katie drunk on his floor puking again. Damn girl. That vodka be your Satan. But, anyway, he be such a geek he be telling me about this thing call Analytical Googling where he be seeing how people find this website. He call me periodically + tell me the same shit. Damn that white boy need a life. He obsessed with celebrities in a different way than Katie. Katie try being philosophical white girl who want to talk cultural connection + shit… I talking to her drunk ass a couple day ago. You know what she going on and on about?

She talking about how celebrity responsible for anorexia + shit. Now, I know where she coming from…but, I think she makin’ a big leap because I think fashion model also do that shit…but, I also think the standards come from us a little bit too. Thing that bother me about Katie is she want to assign causality completely to celebrity. I say…wait: what about free will + shit niggas??!! What about a person who in the midst of the minefield but navigate through and find a little bit of happy in life?

Katie always want to act like everybody powerless over they destiny. That the person just acted upon. But, people also actor too. I don’t think Katie appreciate that I got intellectual side too. She act like I a dumb black girl. She never will say that because she a big liberal type…but, ghetto teach you how to read people. OH, yes it does!

For Skippy, his obsession with celebrity is basically cause he a weird guy and horny. But, he can’t be totally weird because most of America obsess with celebrities. Why? Cuz they lives are boring puke. That why. But, Skippy a man and horny and be talking about Elizabeth Hurley and Anita Dark. I say who the fuck Anita Dark? He say she his favorite actress. I Google that shit and say that bitch is pretty but she a porno ho. But, yea she got pretty eye and nice face. But, Skippy just a horny loser.

I know he going to read this. I don’t care. He just think I a dumb black bitch. Anyway, Skippy laughin’ saying that the majority of people find this site by searching for celebrity vagina, celeb vagina, and celeb pussy. And, it true! And, I think to myself, “Damn, people, it just a little hole that baby come out of.” Sure, I know fellas it feel good when you stick your dick in there…but, damn, what sort of weird fucking people getting all obsess with celebrity pussy. The bitches that started this crazy shit be Lindsay Lohan and Britney Spears…and, the queen of it be that Sharon Stone Basic Instinct leg cross where she flash her white girl pussy for a millisecond, and everybody go shit fuck crazy.

Oh, what a fucking fuck up crazy planet.

Why Obama gotta have that Rick Warren dude be giving invocation + shit? WHy Rick Warren? Why, he look stupid as fuck with that beard and beady eyes! But, that not what bother me about him so much. What bother me is it just another stupid-ass, stupid-looking, overweight white man who gonna act like he got the ultimate answer in life. And, that ain’t really change to me. If the queer want to marry, who give a fuck? That they business. Let them have they freedom. NO! We gotta have Rick Warren white man towering above with his opinion. WE DON’T WANT YOUR OPINION FATTY! We aren’t interested in your bullshit you brainwashed brainwashing white man. Okay?

And, Rick Warren, you look stupid as fuck. Ya look like a guy without dinner table discipline. You get your own weight under control before you start comin’ at me like you got life’s answers. This what he said recently:

The Bible admonishes us to pray for our leaders. I am honored by this opportunity to pray God’s blessing on the office of the President and its current and future inhabitant, asking the Lord to provide wisdom to America’s leaders during this critical time in our nation’s history.

What kind of crazy bullshit is that? Why “the Lord” going to listen to this sloppy, bearded man? WHITE POWER! NOt anymore buddy. Not anymore. Barack Obama President. MULATTO POWER!

So, Katie said I should be writing about political figures because they celebrity too. Maybe. But, they ain’t kissing on the silver screen. Isn’t that what white folk call it… “the silver screen” ? Interesting. Shit, black girl tired. I don’t see where any of this shit celebrity. I understand Barack Obama sort of like rock star. But, he ain’t like acting in some fucking movie with like Joy Behar or something.

Shit, why Joy Behar come to mind? She a sweet little fatty herself. I bet she love donut. But, she real likable and shit. I always found her cool. That skinny white girl blondie on The View…Elizabeth Hassumbuck or whatever…oh, she a little twit. She remind me of Katie! seriously, Katie a lot like that … when both white girl get upset it like a beetle suddenly crawled up their butt the way they back get straight and they eyes get fixated….oh, shit white folk at end of 2008 …..and this black girl trying to make an honest buck. It ain’t easy niggas. I used to think sex sell…but with economy way it is…maybe nothing sell.

Shit I gonna be eating Kraft Mac for a while niggas.

Peace in between…….

She remind me of this scene where Jesse Spano is cranky ganky on coffee caffeine pills, and she start singing “I’m so excited. I’m so excited.” And, white boy Zack is a real girly man of a shithead: “You really are taking drugs.” AH, shit, my black ass just hit the white man’s floor in this ghetto apartment building!

Ah, Katie, get your ass together girl.